FORMER MISTRESS CONFESSION: HOW TO TELL YOUR HUSBAND HAS ANOTHER WOMAN IN THE CLOSET AND CHEATING WHILE THE FAMILY IS ON VACATION

How to tell if YOUR husband is cheating while you’re on your family holiday… by a reformed mistress who knows ALL his secrets

MARRIAGE RATE IN U.S. JUST 31%, THE LOWEST IN OVER A CENTURY, U.S. MARRIAGE RATE IN 1920 WAS 92.3 AND SINCE 1970 IT DROPPED BY ALMOST 60%

Marriage rate drops to lowest in a century: study

In 1920, the marriage rate was 92.3. Now, it has plummeted to 31.01, according to the National Center for Family and Marriage Research. U.S. women are also waiting longer to walk down the aisle for the first time.

THE FAKE ARREST THAT ENDS IN MARRIAGE PROPOSAL…YOU CAN SAY TRAUMATIC ROMANTIC?

 

Fake arrest ends in marriage proposal

 

Yahoo

 

Ben Vienneau of Saint John, Canada proposed to his girlfriend, Marcia Belyea, in a very unorthodox way, which he hopes will win the couple their dream wedding. Vienneau worked with his police officer brother-in-law to arrange a mock arrest of his girlfriend as a set up for his marriage proposal and video entry to a radio contest awarding the wackiest proposal with a wedding by the sea. Vienneau called the mission a, “10-29…a marriage proposal in progress.”

FAT IS BEAUTIFIL THAT’S WHY MEN FATTEN UP THEIR LADIES: MAURITIAN WOMEN FATTEN THEMSELVES UP AND TAKE GROWTH HORMONES AS MEN CONSIDER OBESE WIFE AS SIGN OF WEALTH AND PRESTIGE

Force fed to find a husband: How Mauritanian women are fattened up ‘like foie gras geese’ and take dangerous animal growth hormones to satisfy men’s love for larger lady

• Big is believed to be beautiful in the West African country
• Obesity in a wife is a sign of wealth and prestige

LIVE-IN COMMITMENT GAP: WOMEN MORE COMMITTED TO THEIR LIVE-IN PARTNERS COMPARED TO MEN, WOMEN SEEING IT STEP TOWARD MARRIAGE WHILE MEN AS WAY TO POSTPONE COMMITMENT

Moving in with your boyfriend? It feels a step closer to marriage but he might just be postponing that proposal

DIVORCE TRAUMA:CHILDREN MORE LIKELY TO BE VIOLENT, HAVE SEX EARLY, TAKE DRUGS, DRINK HEAVILY AND MENTALLY ILL, ACCORDING TO BRITISH STUDY

The terrible toll of making divorce easier: Children are more likely to be violent, take drugs and have underage sex

• Divorce has a major effect on every facet of a child’s later life
• Relaxation of divorce laws have seen number of broken homes increase

GETTING MARRIED AT 92 TO A 22-YEAR-OLD BRIDE? AN IRAQI FARMER JUST DID THAT AND HE DID IT IN A TRIPLE WEDDING CEREMONY WITH HIS GRANDSONS

 

Iraqi farmer, 92, and father of 16 marries for a second time… to a woman 70 YEARS younger than him

• Triple wedding ceremony included 92-year-old’s two teenage grandsons and their brides
• Musali Mohammed al-Mujamaie’s wife of 58 years died three years ago
• He has 16 children and said he feels like a twenty-year-old

‘YOU DON’T GET TO LEAVE ME AGAIN!’ : ABANDONED SON CRIES TO FATHER NFL PLAYER AVEION CASON WHO LEFT HIM 10 YEARS AGO, CONFESSED RESENTMENT AND ‘FELT HE WAS A MISTAKE’ AND NOT ‘SUPPOSED TO BE HERE’

‘You don’t get to leave me again!’: Tearful moment an NFL player was confronted by son he left behind 10 years ago

• Cameras were rolling on the set of Oprah’s Life Class as Aveion Cason‘s crying son Aveion Jr., 13 tried to break the fatherless-son cycle

NEW DATING GUIDE: ‘IT’S OKAY TO SLEEP ON A FIRST DATE’…HOW ABOUT CALLING IT ‘HOW TO BE CHEAP ON A FIRST DATE AND LOSE A GUY’S RESPECT AFTER YOURS TOTALLY DISAPPEARS’, RIGHT GUYS?

Yes you CAN have sex on the first date! New dating guide turns The Rules on their head with advice on everything from sexting to dating dress codes

By Catherine Townsend

PUBLISHED: 17:07 EST, 3 July 2013

A new dating guide is challenging conventional wisdom by telling women it’s fine to have sex on the first date. Andrea Syrtash and Jeff Wilser, authors of the new dating guide It’s Okay To Sleep with Him on the First Date: And Every Other Rule of Dating, Debunked told theNew York Post that the current crop of dating guides are ‘of another era’. 

THE IMPOSSIBLE DEMANDS OF WEALTHY DIVORCED WOMEN: ‘A YOUNGER, SEXIER AND RICHER MAN’ ACCORDING TO DATING GURU RICHARD IRSHENBAUM

“Women who take a tough line often wind up lonelier for it. At a political fund-raiser, my wife Dana and I were chatting with a well-regarded financier’s ex-wife, who clearly exhibited pre-realistic dating tendencies. She laid out her requests like the Marshall Plan: “My age or younger. I won’t date a geezer. Rich—the richer the better. Sexy.  Okay, let’s just cut to the chase: my ex if he had abs and a personality.”“Don’t you think you shouldn’t have a list?” Dana asked innocently. “That’s for other people,” she snapped. She is still on the prowl.

‘SEXRETARY WITHOUT OPINION’ : WHAT RICH AND DIVORCED MEN WANT IN A NEW WIFE ACCORDING TO DATING GURU RICHARD KIRSHENBAUM

‘Tits on a stick, a blonde wig and tell me I’m great when I get home’: What rich, divorced men REALLY want in a new wife

MOMMY KNOWS BEST: THE RISE OF MOM MATCHMAKING WEBSITES TO HELP FIND A WIFE FOR THEIR SON

 

Are you good enough for my son? The rise of mom matchmaking websites that help impatient parents seek love for their kids

Mothers, and some father’s too, who are impatient to see their single sons wed are now turning to online dating websites to search for an ideal match – and hopefully, future daughter-in-law.

Websites such as The J Mom, Duo, and Telugu Matrimony all cater to parents who are willing to try anything to successfully match-make their marriage-age children.

‘It’s almost like outsourcing your online dating to your mom,’ Kevin Leland, chief executive of TheJMom.com, a Jewish matchmaking site, told The New York Times.

LATEST MATCHMAKING WEBSITE: VINEA LOVE IS THE DATING WEBSITE MADE FOR WINE LOVERS ALL OVER THE WORLD

By Victoria Taylor / NEW YORK DAILY NEWS

vinealove.com

VineaLove is an international dating and networking site for wine lovers.

 Wine aficionados seeking a special someone to split a bottle with now have their own online dating website. VineaLove, the brainchild of former wine journalist Françoise Pauly, officially launched on Sunday at Vinexpo in Bordeaux, France.

“About two months ago, I just woke up with this thought that there wasn’t a dating website for wine lovers,” she said in an interview with the Daily News. “I know there are dating websites for everybody else from geeks to heavy metal fans, so obviously there’s a need for a one for wine lovers.”

MEET THE NSA WHISTLE BLOWER’S POLE DANCER BALLERINA GIRLFRIEND OF FOUR-YEARS

 

EXCLUSIVE: The beautiful ballerina girlfriend whistleblower Ed Snowden was set to wed before he left her in Hawaii and fled to Hong Kong to leak NSA secrets. Now she says she feels ‘adrift’

• Lindsay Mills, 28, is reportedly the girlfriend Edward Snowden left behind when he leaked information about PRISM surveillance
• She wrote on a blog about romantic heartbreak after Snowden fled to Hong Kong
• ‘My world has opened and closed all at once. Leaving me lost at sea without a compass’ she wrote
• Couple previously went to Hong Kong for romantic getaway
• Mills is a ballerina who attended the Maryland Institute College of Art
• She performs with the Waikiki Acrobatic Troupe

HOW TO KNOW YOU’RE DATING A HIGH-MAINTENANCE WOMAN?

Fashion by Rachel Ariel Photography (Photo credit: rawphotowomen)

Men are visual creatures and they are baffled that when they marry that gorgeous woman they love, she becomes the most high-maintenance “equipment” in the family, sometimes even more expensive than the monthly mortgage. I’ve asked men if they can tell a high-maintenance woman and they said no. Here are 1o signs:

1. SHE ALWAYS LOOK DOLLED-UP

Next to themselves, high-maintenance women love their mirrors. They can’t live without checking themselves on a mirror every hour making sure the lipstick and make-up are perfect. They spend longer time preparing for any date and always want to deliver “wow” factor when they  show themselves. She always want to look like a model who stepped out of a cover magazine.

2. CHECK THE BRAND OF HER PURSE.

A woman who hardly makes anything but is carrying a $200 purse or more  is a sure high-maintenance woman. And women who make good money and enjoy buying them expensive and as many and as often as they can have an insatiable-purse-syndrome. It’s an indication of a lifetime high-purse maintenance.

Men don’t understand that a woman’s purse is her identity and women would ooohh and ahhh when they see a certain label. If men love to drive their dream car, women want to tote around high expensive purses.

So if a woman only carries an expensive brand purse, no matter if she can afford it or not, then she’s sure a high-maintenance. Watch out for labels like Louis Vuitton, Chanel, Prada, Marc Jacobs, Fendi and Hermes crocodile. These are the labels that can cost up to a million and years of waiting list. Hermes is a $150,000 purse and years ago, the Hermes store in France didn’t recognize Oprah and didn’t allow her to shop there. The mid-price brands are Coach, Dooney and Bourke, Nine West, etc. These purses during discount sale are sold at least $100.

3. CHECK HER MONTHLY BEAUTY MAINTENANCE

Men get a haircut and they don’t call their friends to tell them about it nor would they expect their friends to notice and compliment them on their new haircut but to a woman it’s a highlighted event that deserves celebration and hour of conversation. If a woman likes to change her hairstyle a lot or has a regular visit to a hair salon, that means her visit to her hairstylist is a minimum of hundreds of dollars a month maintenance. And also, her hairstylist may be her confidante and plays a very valuable sounding board role in her life so there’s no way for her to dump her.

Check the woman’s nails also. Those fancy nails done in nail spa can cost from $50-$90. Just plain manicures would cost $20 but can be a twice a month visit. Check if she also does tanning, a $10-$15 per session maintenance. If she has little poodle or chihuahua or whatever dog is trending, expect her to take that dog for dog clothes shopping and to a dog spa for fancy maintenance and relaxation. Check also if she has a monthly spa massage visit. That’s another hundred plus cost.

4. SHE HAS A FASHION SENSE

Fashion sense means she loves to shop fashionably and lives a fashionable life. Her favorite pastime is shopping, whenever she’s happy, bored or depressed. She believes in shopping therapy as a cure to boredom and depression, or when you two had a fight. When buying clothes, it also means buying shoes. Her dream shoes are the $2,000 pair of Jimmy Choo shoes and Malono Blahnik. Checking her overflowing wardobe full of unused clothes and her line of shoe-collection signifies a high-maintence habit.

5. SHE ONLY WANTS TO GO TO A CASUAL-TO-FINE DINING RESTAURANTS

High-maintenance women are obsessed with appearance and their whole life is all about how fancy or expensive-looking people perceive them. Going to restaurant means they can dress up, look expensive and show their expensive dining taste by ordering a cocktail like martini or wine like a cabernet, merlot or pinot grigio. She won’t drink tap water even if it’s filtered and would order bottled water only.

6. SHE HAS A PRINCESS MENTALITY

She is vain, needy, whiny, nothing is good enough for her, and she complain whenever she does household chores fearing her golden tiara may fall off from her her head. She thinks she’s so special it’s considered a privilege to be in her presence and she thinks you should be thankful she chose you as her boyfriend or date. She’s full of me-factor. Meaning she can be a narcissist with her on top of the list all the time and you at the very bottom as far as priority. They tend to be unhappy too because they get their satisfaction and happiness from never ending acquisition of material stuff so their mind is always keeping up with the rich Joneses of the world. They are brats in their celf-centereness.

7. SHE DOESN’T WANT TO BE SEEN WITH YOU IF YOU DON’T MEASURE UP

High-maintenance women always carry the right accessories with them and to them you are one of their accesories. They don’t date “down” and if they go out with you, they would go into an extreme makeover on your appearance and your tastes. She is going to be your fashion critic, meaning she will dress you up the way she believes you should. If you don’t look right, if you don’t have the right car, the right career, the right bank account, the right get-up, she won’t be interested with you.

8. SHE MAY HAVE A THERAPIST ALTHOUGH THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH HER

High maintenance women love to be surrounded by expensive professionals and although there’s nothing wrong with her, having a therapist she goes to every week is a lifestyle must. If she a therapist that means later on you marry her, all problems will be discussed and all solutions will be given by the therapist. Marrying a woman with a therapist is like walking down the aisle with her therapist as part of the pre-nup.

9. ANNIVERSARIES, BIRTHDAYS, HOLIDAYS, VACATIONS INVOLVE HUGE PRICE TAG

Everything has to be done in style and you better be careful what you give her on her birthday and other special occasion. She expects elaborate preparations, expensive gifts, expensive hotels and eventually expensive wedding and expensive home.

10. SHE MAY BE POLITICALLY CLUELESS OR USELESS BUT MORE LIKELY SHE’S GOING TO BE A DEMOCRAT

Since she loves reading fashion magazines and enjoys watching reruns of Sex and the City, her source of political news are liberal Anna Wintour of  Vogue magazines and Sarah Jessica Parker.

CONCLUSION: As one article said, being stuck with a high maintenance woman is like having a high maintenance car that needs constant polishing soon you wonder if it’s worth it. A high maintenance woman is like a trophy, you feel good looking at it because you captured a challenge but as far as relevance in day to day life, she is a drag that would eventually exhaust you with her irrational spending, vanity, self-centerness, whining and plain narcissism. A woman of substance she’s not going to be but living with a spoiled little girl who never grew up is what you’re going to get.

Copyright 2013 katenews2day

91 YEARS IS THE LONGEST MARRIAGE RECORDED IN HISTORY

John and Ann Betar of Connecticut got married 80 years ago on November 25, 1932 and today considered as the longest married couple in the US. The longest married couple in the world as of 2013 is from England. Karam and Kartari Chand got married on January 6, 1925 and ben married for 88 years now. But the longest marriage in history lasted 91 years.

Daniel Frederick and Susan Bakeman of New York got married on August 29, 1772 four years before the American Independence when America was still a British colony. In 1863, ninety one years later after their marriage,  the first Republican party president Abraham Lincoln passed the Emancipation Proclamation, proclaiming freedom to all slaves.

Daniel and Susan Bakeman got married while America was fighting for the birth of a free nation and their marriage ended ninety one years later with America involved in another battle of its own- the Republican party of Licoln fighting the Democrat party to bring freedom and to end slavery. Their marriage witnessed almost a century of history of this country. They witnessed the birth of America as a nation and they left watching America being divided and devastated by the Civil War of 1863.

Copyright 2013 katenews2day

LOVE STORIES OF TECH GIANTS BILL GATES, SERGEY BRIN AND MARK ZUCKERBERG

Bill and Melinda Gates during their visit to the Oslo Opera House in June 2009. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The ladies behind tech giants Microsoft, Google and Facebook were able to snag the billionaires back when they were ordinary men pursuing their dreams. One thing you would notice, Bill Gates, Sergey Brin and Mark Zuckerberg didn’t go for models and celebrities when they were looking for a spouse. They instead chose the woman who were there with them from the very beginning, long before the billions and celebrity status arrived. Here are short stories on how they met their wives.

1. BILL GATES AND MELINDA FRENCH

In 1987, four months after Melinda French worked at Microsoft, she first met Bill Gates at a New York Expo Trade-Fair dinner while sitting next to him. She found him funny she said. Months later they met again in Microsoft’s parking lot and Bill this time asked her to go out with him “in two weeks from this coming Saturday”. Melissa told him instead to call her when closer to the date and that night, Bill called and asked her out. Since he had a meeting that finished very late that night and not sure what restaurants were still open, he decided they stay at his house and talk and that was their first date. And on January 1, 1994 they got married in Hawaii and they now have two children. Today they are busy with their Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation.

2. SERGEY BRIN AND ANN WOJCICKI

Google co-founder Sergey Brin was the most eligible bachelor in the world until he married Ann Wojcicki in 2007. Ann is a biotech analyst and cofounder of biotech company 23&Me. They had a wedding in Bahamas attended by close friends and families wherein the bride wore a white swimsuit ( the dream wedding attire she told her mother) and the groom wore a black one. Ann and Sergey met when Sergey and Larry Page were renting the garage of Ann’s elder sister Susan during the founding years of the search engine giant Google.

3. MARK  ZUCKERBERG AND PRISCILLA CHAN

Well, the movie Social Network practically told the story on how they met. Pricilla and Mark met at a Jewish frat party Alpha Epsilon Pi at Harvard while they were both standing in line for the bathroom. The Chinese-American noticed Mark for his “nerdy” look. They got married in 2012.  She is a graduate of  medical school and inspired him to launch the organ donor program of Facebook.

Melinda Gates, Ann Wojcicki, Priscilla Chan: three lucky women chosen by the three tech giant owners of the 21st century. But Bill Gates, Sergey Brin and Mark Zuckerberg are more lucky because these women not only remained down-to-earth despite of being first ladies of the tech world. They made them better people than ever, taking them beyond their empire, bringing out the best in them by getting them involve in touching lives and making the world a better place.

Copyright 2013 katenews2day

DAKOTA FANNING AND HOW HER PARENTS’ LOVE STORY INSPIRED HER TO WAIT ON LOVE WHILE TAYLOR SWIFT STILL DESPERATE

English: Actress Dakota Fanning at Twilight Saga: Eclipse Premiere at Nokia Plaza in Los Angeles, CA (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The almost 19-year-old star Dakota Fanning revealed on last month’s interview with Glamour magazine why she’s not dating at all and that’s because of her parents love story.

Dakota said, “She has this weird vision of relationships because my parents have known each other since second grade and got married right out of college. I’ve always thought that’s how it’s supposed to be like, and if it’s not, then I don’t want to waste my time…I was like, “I’m not gonna marry this person, so what’s the point?” It’s not me being naive. I just know how it’s supposed to be like. And I think until I feel that , I don’t want to be bothered.”

They said when there’s no love inside a home, expect the children to try to find it outside. But when there’s love overflowing inside a home, children won’t seek or feel the need to find love outside by getting into early relationships. Dakota Fanning is unique because she demonstrates this confidence of being “whole”, a young woman not seeking or crying out for love of a man so she can be “happy” and fulfilled.

She knows exactly what she wants and she wants to experience the kind of true love her parents have. She won’t settle for trial-and-error-romances, a way of exposing a heart to many possible heartbreaks,  leaving scars, crushed self-esteem and bitterness eventually making anyone who goes through many broken hearts becoming a skeptic of love instead of believer of true love. Dakota Fanning is like Victoria Seaton, the character of Judith McNaught‘s romantic novel ” Once and Always“, wherein the character declared she wants to love only once but will be for always.

Dakota would love wholeheartedly and because her parents have a good loving marriage, she doesn’t need to look very far for guidance on what love is supposed to be and on how to keep that love becoming better and deeper as time goes by. Dakota Fanning is very lucky because she got her own parents love story as an example of one true love, something many kids in America cannot say today due to divorce and many mashed up broken families.

In the meantime, 23-year-old Taylor  Swift already had six high-profile relationships, averaging nine months per relationship and although she’s a rich, talented, gorgeous blonde, her many disastrous relationships won’t exempt her from experiencing the consequences of multiple broken hearts- scars in memory of every man who broke her heart, bitterness for all the failures, self-doubt and damaged self-esteem asking what’s wrong with her, becoming cynical and distrustful of men, and instead later on having fun with her relationship she would be tense and paranoid about its future, not able to relax for fear it’s going to fail again.

Dakota has many good things in her life but her parents are the best gift God has given her in this world. For parents, love each other because that’s the best gift you can give your children, more than any of the material things you can ever buy for them. If every kid in America is inspired by the love and the love stories of their parents, this country won’t be filled with broken kids growing up to become broken adults to become broken husband or broken wife and eventually as broken parents. We can’t fix the world by creating more broken people. But we can create a new generation of whole kids by making our love stories an inspiration for them to follow.

Copyright 2013 Ketchie V. Schauf

WHAT MEN WANT IN A WOMAN

Actress Angelina Jolie and Actor Brad Pitt (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Men are visual creatures and no matter how old they are, they would always notice a good looking woman passing by unless they are blind or gay. But according to online surveys,  men are not looking for celebrity-packaged women but actually want average looking women. Men are realistic and they know unless they are Brad Pitt, no way they can get all the Angelina Jolies of this world. They also know a celebrity-looking-packaged  woman may come with a huge price tag of constant high maintenance, mirror absorption, self-absorption, queen-bee mentality, prone to lateness and histrionics, and may be more concerned about breaking her nails rather than breaking his heart.

Men want an average woman, someone who’s not starving herself to preserve her self-esteem  nor who uses food as source of emotional comfort. They don’t like also too much “war paint” or make-up on women. To them, the lesser and more natural, the sexier you look. They prefer long hair so if possible don’t get a haircut shorter than your man. They want women to dress nicely but appropriately. Go sexy but elegant ( avoid slutty look) when on a date. But when meeting family and friends, go casual. Cover up decently to avoid awkward peek-a-boo situations.

Smile because that’s the first thing a man would notice and the most important physical adornment  of any woman. Men wants a woman who has a happy countenance, someone who smiles naturally. They like to be around a happy woman. They would see that woman as fun to be with, a sunshine that would bring light to their days, someone they want to keep for good. But a woman who looks like she swallowed a lemon and forgot to spit it out is negative looking to any man. Not only a dour looking woman signals an unhappy person but also speaks of many other possible troubles lurking beneath that unhappy face. That’s why men considered women’s eyes as women’s most attracted feature because it’s the window to our soul- it reveals the amount of light or darkness, the humor, the pain, the bitterness, the inner soul. Smile can make any woman look attractive. It’s the easiest way to improve one’s appearance.

But more than physical beauty, men want the inner beauty. The most beautiful woman can become ugly to any man because of her character. A beautiful looking woman who is selfish, critical, rude, disrespectful, whiny and childish would become repulsive and unattractive. Instead of wanting to be with her, men would find any excuse to be away from her. Men are attracted to women with self-confidence, but not bossy or dominant. A bossy woman tend to be in a constant fighting mode, always holding a score card making sure “equality” is being imposed in the battle of the sexes. Bossy women tend to be also critical but highly sensitive when criticized.  They are also quick to tear men down but hardly try to build them up.

Men don’t mind being told they are wrong- and one time is enough. They never get tired of back rubs (even if it’s just two minutes), unexpected hugs and kisses and cooking their favorite food. Traits both men and women want are honesty, gratitude, loyalty, kindness, thoughtfulness, etc. Everything that is good, we know without asking we all want it.

Men want a woman of substance because in the end they would want a woman who’s not only going to become their wife but also the mother of their children, their partner, long time companion, inspiration, friend, lover, someone they can be a hero to.

Copyright 2013 Ketchie V. Schauf

WHY LOVE IS LIKE A PLANT?

Cover via Amazon

Love is man’s greatest need and man’s greatest pursuit of happiness is finding that one perfect true love, his other half, so the dream of living  “happily ever after” EFFORTLESSLY would finally come true. But sometimes when it comes to love, we put more effort on the pursuing and casting of net to our targeted prey. And when finally got our catch and had our fun and the realities of life become unavoidable , we start to treat our loved one like a forgotten plant, emotionally unacknowledged and rejected by its owner and, although dying, still not getting any water because to the owner it has become emotionally irrelevant. Love is like a plant, you water it or it will die.

So many love stories have great beginnings but sadly, instead of hearing the fairy tale ending “and they live happily ever after”, we hear of tragic ending. Love turned into hate, laughter turned into tears, gentleness turned into cruelty, trust turned into betrayal, pleasure turned into revulsion and longing turned into rejection. Sometimes couples don’t know how it all began. All they know, the love is gone.

The love is dead. And the sad part sometimes, they want it that way. In their hearts, they  secretly want that love to be dead. They are horrified of the thought of saving that marriage, because saving that marriage means being stuck with that person they no longer love. And in their mind, their happiness is with another person somewhere out there and by getting out of that loveless relationship right away, their one true love will come and the dream of  “EFFORTLESSLY happily ever after ” will finally happen.

But love is like a plant. You stop watering it, it will die. You water your love with generous helpings of  kind and loving words, but be stingy or be careful with criticism. It takes 10 praises to erase 1 criticism, and our brain has a tendency to hold longer and coddle memories of grudges, hurts, criticism and unforgiveness. That’s why if you can avoid saying hurtful words, always avoid it . Not only the words will go straight to the other person’s memory bank and stay there, expect also the retaliation and battle of keeping scores to begin. Life and death is in the power of tongue and usually most relationships are killed by bullets of words of criticism, lying, disrespect and cruelty. These dark, negative words would never bring life, only death.

You water your love with laughter, make humor and laughter part of your relationship. You water your love by understanding the need of your spouse and fulfilling it. You water your love by being honest, even when it comes to finances. You water your love by being each other’s best friend, as much as possible share as many common interests with your loved one so you can enjoy each other together. We choose our friends for the reason that we share a lot of things with them, that’s how it should be with our loved one. Water love with respect. You cannot love without respect. Remove respect and soon love would crumble. It’s easy to hurt people we don’t respect, but we are always careful how we treat people we respect. As the Bible says, wife respect your husband and husband, love your wife. Man needs respect, woman needs love.

Most of all, you water your love with faithfulness and loyalty. Bring out the best  of each other but be loyal and faithful when you’re needed most. When your loved one is weak, be his/her strength. Be his cheerleader, his counselor, his emotional support system. Trials should make love better. Just like soldiers, they take pride in their scars and wounds. They know they went to battle and bravely fought the war and they got scars to prove it. Go to life’s trials together, no one left behind.  That’s why relationship is for adults not for little kids, because we are suppose to know how to handle it.

No matter what relationship you’re in right now and how long you’ve been in that relationship, always remember to treat your love like a plant. Water your love..unless for some reason you want it dead. There’s no such thing as an EFFORTLESS “happily ever after”, but by effort of watering your love, you may be able to live happily ever after.

Copyright 2013 Ketchie V. Schauf